I am home from work and off to bed. I will most likely speak to most of you before you read this. I am really looking forward to this weekend in Seaside with my family. Less than 12 hours from now and I will be on the way. See you all soon unless I die on the way there.
In case something unfortunate occurs I prepared an obituary and a funeral plan so you guys won't have to deal with it. Also I want you all to have a good weekend and not worry about me for a couple days. Make sure my funeral is on a Wednesday so you can get out of work. You should tell your boss that the pain is too great and you need at least two more days off so you can scam a five day weekend out of the whole mess. Don't say I never did nothin for ya. I want a luau instead of a normal funeral. Serve Hawaiian Punch and Kalua Pork because they both taste good. I want to be cremated at the luau so just toss an apple in my mouth and light me up. Boone always liked fires so he can start it. Put me in my Hawaiian shirt that Shanna hates and try to find some cool shoes for me to wear. I would also like to be wearing shorts but you should shave my legs first because burning hair smells weird.
In loving memory of Garrett M. Rodriguez.Born in Year, Garrett was a(n) adjective boy who quickly grew into a(n) adjective man. He was a(n) adjective worker at Our Lady of 7 Deadly Sin Hospital for the last number years of his life. He became well known for his work extracting pizza topping from animal (plural). He was a loving relative of number animal. He will be adverb missed and leaves behind his noun.
See ya soon!
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6 comments:
Garrett was a odoriferous boy who quickly grew into a convivial man. He was an idiosyncratic worker at Our Lady of Greed Hospital for the last 82 years of his life. He became well known for his work extracting canadian bacon from giraffes. He was a loving second cousin of 13 oscelots. He will be superlatively missed and leaves behind his tire iron.
In loving memory of Garrett M. Rodriguez. born in the year of our lord 1979, Garrett was a stupendous boy who quickly grew into a abnormal man. He was a tireless worker at Our Lady of Vice Hospital for the last 77.3 years of his life. He became well known for his work extracting mozzarella cheese from Himalayan Rockhopping Goats. He was a loving brother to a pair of handsome chimps. He will be, like, seriously missed and leaves behind his Prelude, which still runs.
See ya soon? No way bucko - I'm gonna make 2101!
Luv - Darren
Nice work people. I appreciate the contributions. Unfortunatly I made it home safe and sound so they will have to wait to be used. At least I have them ready.
I'm glad you made it home! I've got to see that Hawaiian shirt.
who you calling a chimp, chump.
gabe :)
Hah, this is funny Garrett. I hadn't checked your blog since you posted this. I like your writing, and the blog is looking nice.
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